Sunday, October 21, 2012

GOOD BYE 30!!!!

Well Its been a long time since i updated. 
And another year of my life or should i say chapter of this book is 
Coming to an end. 
And yet another new beginning is here. 
Tomorrow is my Birthday and i will begin the 31st year of my life. 
Im happy to close the chapter of 31. 
It has been a rough year. 
Lots of ups and downs. 
Lots of unique roads with twits and turns if i may say. 

I thought 30 was going to be this amazing year in my life 
But to say the least It was one of those years that i learned more than i could have ever expected. 

I may not be perfect 
And i may not be an angel by any means. 
But i can for sure say 
I live and have lived an interesting life thus far. 


I still have days where I battle with demons in my head 
Some days are wonderful and i just live them like theres no tomorrow 
with out any worries in my mind. 
I often find me reminding myself that 


I know a lot f people are on the fence with the fact that i quickly moved in with a man.
I know people like to talk for what ever reason.
So be it. 
Its life and its mine. 
If i feel something in my heart I'm going to go for it.
I have been extremely happy with Dan for the past few months 
And he has found a home in my heart. 
Yeah some days are tough 
Considering we have both been through a lot in life and over the past year on our own paths. 
But its nice to have each other to talk to and attempt to cheer each other up at the end of the day. 

Life wasn't ment to be easy. 
If it was then what fun would that be?
So why not have a little fun trying to make it through the tough times. 
Life has found a way of making me smile since Dan has entered my life. 
And in my mind that is a good thing. 

I just have to remember Im where i am today cause i choose to walk to where i am. 
My story has lead me here. 
Back to NJ. 
Which for once isn't a bad thing. 
I like being near my family. 
It puts some comfort in my mind and my heart. 
I still feel broken and fragile on some days. 
If life was perfect i would be writing a fairy tale and not this blog.
With my ups and downs I'm lucky that Dan is patient with me.
And understanding for the most part. 



I know a lot of you have asked why i haven't posted a blog in about 2 months now.
And I'm still not sure if i was ready to write an update but felt i should close out 30 with one. 
Well I personally needed some down time to just be me. 
To settle into my new life, My new relationship, and my new home. 
(heck I'm still not unpacked cause i think we may be moving in the next month or 2) 
I had to get over some things that were bothering me and battle some unexpected demons.
So I took my down time and spent some time with my feet up.
I let life slow down a bit. 
Took sue time to breathe.
And began to enjoy art again. 

I started enjoying simple things in life again. 
Like fun free days at the park with dan and his daughter  and her friend
Feeding Peacocks .
Laughing and smiling

Picking out an annoying family pet or two.
Meet one of Kaylas new Crazy escape artist Hamsters.

Enjoying cuddles from Tessie the cute french bull dog. 
She's my buddy

And doing arts and crafts with Kayla  creating more friends Like Rocky the giant pet rock. 

My health has had its ups and downs since I've been back. 
My foot is finally healed. 
But is a little tight and will never be 100% the same but ill settle for being able to wear a shoe and walk on my own two feet again.
But on the down side, My kidneys started giving me problems again which took me back to the doctor and I found out that me and the Flu do not get along. 
At least I'm back by people who care, My family and friends. 
And they are close by if i need them. 
Heck my mom even allowed me to take a nap in her driveway the other day cause i wanted to be outside with her but didn't feel good. 

Its been nice to reconnect with Friends like Shannon
Yup she's the girl i loved enough to tattoo on my leg. 
Trouble reunited.
Ive known her since i was 13yrs old. 

Its been nice to spend time with Adrienne and her kids 
Faith and Arianna 
Acting like crazy creatures in the park scooting around talking to the animals. 

Ive had the pleasure of going out in my home town to the bar with my Mom, Stan and Dan
I even had the pleasure of capturing Stan and Dan singing the grateful dead together.   

We have been spending ALOT of time at Dans tattoo shop. 
More than i may like sometimes. 
But its teaching me what it takes to be a business owner and work for your self. 
Dan doesn't do Tattoos but Rose City Tattoos in Rahway. But He owns it and this shop has been his Baby for 6 Years now. 
He Built it from the ground up and i admire him for going into business for himself. 
Its still taking a lil getting used to that this partially has turned into my life too. 
But as i used to say when i worked for Phil running the skate shop.
The business owner should be extremely involved with the business' daily happening.
I admire Dan for all he puts into his shop. 
This place has his heart and soul poured into it. 

During the good and bad. 
But if you walk into the shop you can tell Dan has spent a lot of time Making this shop home. 
And i think he did an amazing job at doing so. 
Some days its tough to accept this place is his second child. 
But i love him and know If i want to be part of his life then the shop will be part of mine too. 


I enjoy spending time with his new Artist Lynn.
She is a breathe of fresh air and super sweet. 
And a pretty damn good artist too. 
Right now They have a special going on till Halloween 
Lynn drew up a few sheets of flash That they are only charging $50 for anything off these sheets in full color. Below is an example of one of her flash sheets and one of her finished Tattoos off the sheet. 

Dan n I managed to get away one day with Kayla for a trip to new hope. 
It was a fun day for the three of us. 
With beautiful weather to top it. 



Completely off subject but in the order of how life has been happening.
I had a little mental break down the other day.
I took a little trip to the Social Security Office.
To regain my identity As Tiffany Harned
Well It was a 123 event of regaining my name there.  

The DMV was a completely different story. 
They gave me a hassle about regaining my name and my Permission to drive in this state. 
Believ it or not it was easier on paper to take on the name of a stranger than to get back the one i was born with. 
I went though a few days of being extremely confused and a bit moody. 
I discovered on certain paper work i was forgetting what name i should sign since it had been way too long since i had signed my maiden name,
I almost forgot how to sign it. 
My ATM Card was in my married name and my DL was in my maiden. 
One would assume getting MY REAL NAME BACK would be easy on the mind and would be a joyful thing. But it was a bit of a toll on my mind.
Even though I now Enjoy having my Birth name back. 
It was easier to change it back on FB than it was on every inch of paper that makes me myself to the government. 
I guess when they say divorce isn't easy. 
This may be one part of what they were talking about. 
Enough debbie downer talk Back to some excitement. 

After that ordeal It was nice to  have a fun lunch with Dan and Kayla and a nice game of checkers to take my mind off over thinking things. 

Ive been having fun being fun and random with Kayla on some days. 
One morning we decided to be cute and dress up as a panda and a tiger and go out in the rain to pick flowers for dan to get him our of a grumpy mood. 
"What man can stay grumpy when your daughter and girlfriend wake you up to cuddles and flowers dressed as animals. 
I love spending time with Kayla. 

Dan took it upon himself to Surprise Kayla and I with Presents. 
Turns out he for an artist who specialized in POP ART.
The artist had some pieces that he already had made and reproduces for sale online.
And Dan asked if the guy had any of Penny wise the Clown 
The guy said no but that he could make one. 
So Dan commissioned the artist to make me a Pennywise and Kayla a Gizmo. 
I adore my Pennywise.
And I love that for once i have a boyfriend that gets what i like. 


Besides all of that I'm sure you are wondering what is going on with my Job ?
How am i supporting myself?
Well As much as i love the Yeti Team 
We all realized That i wasn't making much progress in Sales as they had wished i could, 
And being back here in NJ was making it a little difficult to set up meetings and work on projects with the team. 
The time difference also took a minor toll on everything too. 
And on top of  everything i started to think a career with health ins. may be good for me since i have become accident prone and my kidneys started acting up again. 
So in a very friendly manor i parted ways wishing them the best of luck in their endeavors 
and i moved onto my next employment venture. 

With a little luck and a few good friends and OH of course my MOM.
I landed a job doing customer service for the Linehaul company that was so kind to ship my life back and forth the country a few times. 
Its basically a 9-5 where i answer phones and do some data entry and help track trucks and freight across the USA.
Oh and i have to dress normal for this job too. 

I got my own desk and a laptop to work from. And it may not be as creative or free as my vision of what i would be doing for a living may have been. 
But it is a weekly pay check with health benefits to come soon and a 401K 
(what ever the heck that may be)
Its nice that every day on my way to work i get a glimpse of the NYC sky line. 
And it reminds me of where i came from and why i enjoyed growing up here on the east coast.


I took a few hours to take a walk down by the Jersey city Water front down by ellis island with a view of NYC and the Statue of Liberty

It was nice to check out the memorials they had put up for the twin towers. 

After my walk at Liberty state park i was blessed with the Chance to attend a Company Dinner with drinks when all of the sales people flew in to discuss the future of our company and how there is so much room to grow with this company. 

The place we went for dinner was beautiful. 
It over looked NYC and the Freedom tower which is in progress of being built in the place of the twin towers. 

They even had a larger than life out door chess board. 


LIFE IS ACTUALLY PRETTY GOOD AS OF THE MOMENT.....
I don't have much to complain about at the moment. 

Ive had the amazing opportunity of getting to spend time with my MOM and Stan and DAD and Fran. 
Ive had a few nice days where i got to enjoy a bite to eat and great conversation with my GRANDMA AND GRANDPA. Who i love them both dearly. 
Some days i feel like they expected more from me. But they have always been so supportive in everything i have ventured into I am beyond Grateful to have them in my Life. 
I LOVE YOU GRANDMA AND GRANDPA.
OH AND MOM STAN, DAD, and can't forget Fran. 
I don't know what i would have done in life with my amazing Family.
Its so nice to be back. 
Even though there aren't enough hours in the day to see them nearly 1/2 as much as i would like to. 



Speaking of Family Dan and i attended my cousin Brendas wedding last weekend. It was nice to get all dressed up with him and intro due him to my dads side of the family and see my cousin marry the love of her life. 
Congrats BRENDA AND STEVE. 
Below is a picture of Dan and i all dressed up from that night. 
Im a lucky lady to have a man like Dan to make me smile. 

And don't worry i didn't catch the bouquet 
But that may be because Dan and i spent way too much time in the awesome photo booth they had set up at their wedding. 
Below is a few pics i choose to put together from the many sheets of photos we walked away with. 
He is just as much of a goof ball as I am when there is a camera around. 
AND I LOVE IT!!!!

Its nice to smile again, Its nice to have a partner in Crime and a partner in life that is as amazing as he is. 
We are sort of inseparable. Ive only been back in NJ and with him since the beginning of september yet it feels like we have been together for a life time already. 
And I'm ok with that. 
Im comfortable talking to him about everything 
Is this what a REAL RELATIONSHIP IS LIKE?
IS THIS WHAT ITS LIKE TO HAVE AN EQUAL?
IS THIS WHAT I HAVE BEEN MISSING OUT ON ALL MY LIFE?
ILL TAKE IT....
Its so nice that we communicate, we look out for each other, and if one is having a bad day the other encourages to turn the day around to make it a good one. 
We take care of each other when one doesn't feel good, 
And we work together to find solutions with things instead of yelling or throwing temper tantrums. 
Oh such a breathe of fresh air. 
IM A VERY VERY LUCKY GIRL. 

I Love spending time with him and His daughter.
And even his whole Family. 
His mom and dad and sister her husband and his brother and his brothers wife are all amazing too. 
This is to be honest the first time i have had a boyfriend that comes from a good family who he is close with. 
AND I LOVE IT.
Its a nice change to be with someone who believes in being close to their family too. 


Well its late and i could type for another 12 hours about everything that has been going on with my life and my mind. 
But IT JUST TURNED MIDNIGHT 
AND THAT MEANS I AM OFFICIALLY 31 Years OLD!!!!!!
So I am going to go get some rest and prepare for what ever this next chapter has in store for me.  
I have an over load of pics that didn't make it into this blog
But i promise a new blog next week end. 

Thank you taking the time to read my rambles of where life has taken me.
I promise the next blog will be more intense 
A lot more fun
And if your lucky I may take you down the rabbit hole and back up into Wonderland.

Till next time.